Dear Blog,
I watched the tide rise this morning as I sipped my coffee and continued to obsessively calculate how long It'll be until my student loans are paid off. (too long unfortunately)
Updates for me:
1. I'm still burnt out, but thankfully the burnout has moved into the work portion of my life and has allowed for me to find inspiration within the creative/professional side of things. These days, all I want to do is stay in the house and paint--Which is great for my spirit, but working the long hours that I do has gotten in the way of my creative process and has left me feeling frustrated. I wish I could just work a 40 hour work week like normal people do...it would allow me the time to come home after work and still have the energy to paint productively. Instead, I've been pushing through and painting when I have no gas left in the tank, and the results of this work have been proving to make some raw and honest pieces. I'm excited about this body of work, which moves us into update:
2. I have decided that I can take control into my own hands and am having a private solo show at my house. The arts community here isn't super open to outsiders, especially not established artists, so I have the power to have my own fuckin show, bitches. It's at the end of April, and I still have one more piece to make before I can start the process of getting the house ready for an exhibition. I am wicked excited to finally have some work that I'm proud of that can accurately reflect my experience of living in rural Maine as a queer person.
3. I have somehow taken on a design commission??? Might be currently biting off more than I can chew as I only have a little over a month left in Maine before I depart back to Wisconsin, but hey, I'm already past my limit and am somehow finding energy reserves past my breaking point.
4. I'm in love, enuf said.
5. I've been craving textile art and sculpture, but that part of my practice has to wait until I make it back to my new position in wisconsin and get my studio space set up. For now I'm perfectly content working with paint. EXCITING: I've accepted a position working as an artist residency administrator and will be spending my summer surrounded by creative individuals and finally starting to build my creative professional experience. FINALLLY using my degree, this position has come as a blessing to me and I am so so ready to finally have my foot in the arts "industry" door. More to come on that in May when I begin that role.
6. Oh, and I'm 22 now. I worked 12 hours on my birthday and the celebrations were kept to a minimum, a little disappointing, but to be expected due to the climate of everyone's busy ass lives right now. (including my own busy ass life.)
The website and socials will have ample documentation of the house show, so don't worry. None of my pieces will be making it back to Wisconsin with me, they'll live with me as digital documentation instead. Fingers crossed that I can sell off or give away all of this work- otherwise it will meet it's maker in the campfire.
nothing else to report, things will hopefully settle down in the burnout realm as soon as my work schedule can chill TF out. We've been running on empty for a while, but still find energy from nothing.
The misery is passing, perhaps due to the fact that I have so much going on, and there's a sense of hope as my next chapter approaches rapidly.
peace and love and hugs and many kisses,
Ellie
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