Good Morning, the clock reads 6:45, the sun kisses the earth and the birds are eager to let the world know that it has turned to a new day. Slept so well last night, my body feels like it's ready to greet this day. The coffee is hot, and my pajamas keep me wrapped up in the peace from a good sleep.
In the mornings it's easy to imagine that my love is with me, there's this sense of daydreaming comfort that lingers above me as I slowly wade back into reality. Oh, how I wish they were here with me, but also how fortunate I have felt knowing that I have a love that can linger with me like this. Deep calm sneaks it's way in this morning.
We are at the end of week two here with the program. It's exciting to feel the energy of knowing that this place is an inspirational ground for so many souls, including mine. I've been itching to paint, but unsure of what to make art about these days. I'll prbably make art about this: the perfectly mundane and peaceful state of just existing in the world.
Over the last week I was starting to feel stuck, a little restless, which often leads me to being a little bit destructive. Luckily, I was given a gift yesterday that has pulled me out of the stupor that comes with working and having little going on beyond. Mom and I went into the city and did some shopping about. We are so good at filling each other's cups with joy. We are able to say "yes" to eachother so well. We make each other belly laugh. My mom is such a gift, and I am so so lucky to have a relationship that is so uncomplicated with her. As I've gotten older we have become good friends, her as my stabilizer and mentor. She is like my north star (one of my creators, after all.) After a day with her life feels shaken up again. She has roused the glitter in my worldly snow globe to dance around after settling for a bit too long.
Life right now has a flavor of hope. I am starting to imagine futures for myself. Being here at the farmstead has been my goal for the past year, and now that I've made it to this goal post I felt a little stuck. "now what?" It's in these times that I am grateful to be a dreamer, there is a small animal within me that is always hungry for a little bit more. nothing crazy, but always searching for the next destination.
That destination feels like it'll be Maine again, my heart grew some roots there, and I feel like my story in that place is not over. There is a home for me there (in the form of a human) that is eager to shelter me. This summer will continue to reveal If i am ready to let a part of my wild self to be docile and domesticated. I have been trying very hard to not bite the hands that feed me.
Itching for paint, and itching for sculpture. I'm itching to have some work in an exhibition, or a magazine, or something, I'm ready to keep pushing at taking myself seriously as an artist. I am valid.
first, however, I must make some damn work! Get to Work‼ the time is now!
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